Quick Quirky Quotes™ for Week of April 14, 2014

Clown clear 4 for blogSobriety Test
“If you’re the designated driver, have fun with it. At the end of the night drop the people off at the wrong houses.” – Jeff Foxworthy

Keep Failing Until You Get It Right
“How do you get started in this business?” they ask.
“You go out and you fail.” – Stephen Colbert when comedians ask how they can break into the business

Choose One
“You have three choices in life: be good, get good, or give up.” – Gregory House, “House M.D.”

Plugging Away
“You never master anything. You just keep working at it.” – Denzel Washington to David Letterman on his hobby of boxing

Political Advisor
“I have too much respect for the truth to drag it out on every trifling occasion.” – Mark Twain

 

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Icon Cover - AE - Red Ribbon 6Get a FREE copy (PDF abridged edition) of my new book The Wickedly Fun Dictionary of Business – Words That Escaped Me Before My Brain Finished Downloading. It’s quick. It’s quirky. It’s fun!

Download it free at http://www.FootInTheDoor.com.

Here’s a quick peek:

butt-dial, v. Smart ass.

consciously incompetent, adj. The second lowest level of competence. You’re stupid and you know it. Why the Dummies and Idiots books are so popular.

kiss off, v.t. The subject line on your email from your last job interview.

texting, v. Wrds wtht vwls. (Why texting isn’t big in Hawaii.)
“Dear Students: I know when you’re texting in class. Seriously, no one just looks down at their crotch and smiles. Sincerely, Your Teacher.” – Sign posted in high school class

unconsciously incompetent, n. The lowest level of competence. You’re stupid and you don’t know it. It’s when someone asks you to name the ten Supreme Court Justices and you actually come up with ten names.

unintended consequences. Didn’t see that coming! Your mind leaving you thoughtless and alone without telling you it was going.
“Oops!” – Embarrassed presidential contender, and Texas Governor, Rick Perry with his 53-second brain freeze unable to remember one of the three federal departments he wanted to abolish in a nationally televised GOP debate

Attention business owners, sales managers, salespeople, and marketing executives: at the back of the book you’ll see a referral strategy to find new business if you’d rather not cold call.

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How to Start a Conversation with the CEO

English: Henry Kissinger at the 2009 premiere ...

When making a sales call on the CEO or president, how should you begin the conversation?

  1. With several minutes of small talk
  2. Cut to the chase
  3. Wait until the CEO steers the conversation to the subject at hand

(2) Head honchos are usually Driver or Analytical personalities – neither enjoys small talk. Assume you only have fifteen minutes. Take the lead, cut to the chase, and start with your most important point first. It may be the only point you get to make. Speak in specifics: numbers, percentages, and dollars. Be prepared to prove every statement.

Helen Thomas knows where to start: Trying to evade a difficult question, Secretary of State Henry Kissinger said the answer was too long and he didn’t know where to start. Helen Thomas responded, “Then start at the end.”

How to Talk to a Man – La La La La La La La

Barbara and Allan Pease (Why Men Don’t Listen and Women Can’t Read Maps) found that if women want to talk to men, they must understand the men’s M.O. Men are competitive and aggressive in their conversations. Every word counts. Men are conversational bottom liners. Leave out the fluff, get to the point. Women can multi-task conversations. Men are single-task talkers. Brain scans prove it.

And men hate to be interrupted. They found that when two men are talking with each other, rarely will they interrupt one another. (Chris Matthews is the #1 exception.) However, when men are talking with women (sorry ladies – this is not fair but true), they’ll interrupt the women 76% of the time. “Hurry up!” their mind is screaming.

The lesson for women in business? Don’t interrupt the man, be precise with your words, and get to the point with as few words as possible. The lesson for men? Stop interrupting. Give them time to get there. They will. Eventually.

Urgent Care required: Men and women are polar opposites when communicating with each other. Fail to adjust the way you communicate or your message is DOA.